When You Want Them to Change… But They Won’t (Yet)

There’s a unique kind of heartache that comes with watching someone you love drift spiritually. You see how much they need God... not just a quick prayer or Sunday service, but real, desperate pursuit. You ache for them to seek the Lord like their life depends on it… because you know it does.

You want to help. You want to say the right thing, fix it, shake them into wakefulness. But no matter what you say or how hard you try, you can’t want God for them.

And that’s the hardest part.

But here’s the truth: it’s not your job to carry what only God can change. Your desire for their spiritual growth is good, but the burden of transformation was never meant to rest on your shoulders

“The king’s heart is a stream of water in the hand of the Lord He turns it wherever He will.” Proverbs 21:1 (ESV)

Even the most distant heart is not unreachable to God. He doesn’t need our striving, He needs our surrender. He’s not limited by resistance or wandering. The same Spirit that raised Jesus from the grave can breathe life into a spiritually dry soul (Romans 8:11).

So what can you do?

You stop trying to be their savior. You start trusting the only One who actually is.

You live out your faith with consistency, not control. You intercede instead of interfering. You choose hope over helplessness.

“And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up.” Galatians 6:9 (ESV)

God sees your prayers. He hears your tears. He knows how heavy this has been for you. And He’s working... even when you can’t see it.

So keep praying. Keep trusting. Keep showing up in love. And let God be God.

Revival doesn’t start with pressure. It starts with surrender.

Prayer:

Lord, I lift up the person on my heart today. You know where they are spiritually. You know how far they feel from You... even if they don’t see it. I surrender the burden I’ve been carrying and confess my frustration, my fear, and even my attempts to control. Help me love them well, without trying to play Savior. Help me trust You deeply, even when I don’t see change yet. You are faithful, patient, and powerful enough to reach them... just like You reached me. In Jesus’ name, amen.

Worship Song: